[cultivate]

Hi Bro,

It is embarrassing to tell others my story but this is bothering my life now, in fact my whole life. I would like to have some advise or views from others. I can't tell my friends or family so I am feeling miserable.

My wife and I had been married for 3 plus years and didn't have a baby.
Family and friends has been asking do we have any planning yet and i will just came out with some excuses like "we plan not to have baby"

But the truth is , we don't even have sex for 3 years plus or i should say only one time but not a complete sex.

People must be thinking why?
I would say I am a normal guy with a normal sex drive. I always feel like having sex maybe 2 or 3 times per week. So since i do not have the luck to have sex with my wife, I can only DIY. Ocassionaly i have no choice and i must admit i do have to find some other holes outside.

Why am i doing this? Seriously if i can have a normal sex life, i will not have to think of finding outside.

this has been going on for 3 years, i seriously need to think about this issue. I find that this is not healthy and i feel terrible. I tried, I am trying very hard now. I talked to her about this but she will always say until like there is no problem. "We can have sex, it's not that I didn't give you, but I am a girl, i will not initiate to have sex with you" She said. This statement doesn't sound wrong at all.

But the truth is, I tried to touch her, hug her...and her bed is surrounded with papers, computers, TV on...her mind is surrounded with tasks. Sex is never on her mind and she admits that she has no urge at all and she challenge me to ask other girls if they have urge.

I tried to hug her, kiss her, tried to touch her breast but she will hit me and say dun molest her. How? how do i continue when she said all these and all my urge also dies off.

I hope that i can have a healthy sex life now and even after giving birth. What i am going to do now is to continue to seduce her to have sex. But I really dun noe what i should do if all these fails. I have searched the internet for a divorce procedure in Singapore.

What is your advise? Do you think if you are going to have a sexless marriage, will you have a divorce and look for another marriage?