[gizbabe]

Originally Posted by cocobun

Just tell yourself move on, stay happy, just that simple......it's all in the mind. We don't get to live a thousand years so life and time are too precious to be wasted like this......

You got your beautiful moments with him/her before, that's all you need to keep it and move on......there are so many happy things in life you could do and sometimes I just think that the amount of time in our lifes is not even enough so don't waste it like this staying on the same spot.

Originally Posted by adoe1

Sis, perhaps your question of "how to make my FB fall for me" signals your innate need for 'love'.. a real relationship.

Emotions r complicated.. make an attempt to differentiate whether u r really developing something for this FB OR u r seeking 'love'.

If u r developing feelings for your FB, best to end it asap.. otherwise it can be detrimental to your psyche.. u want him yet cannot have him cos married.

If u r seeking love, then start expanding your circle of friends to find a suitable bf. Better to start of non-sexual then when u r sure then sexual. About sexual experimentation, it can be taught to anyone. For eg, it took me a while before I learn how to make a lady squirt. Your new bf can be taught.. via internet or from u.

Good luck in making sense of your feelings.

*clap*clap*clap* Agree! Good advice there!!!

Originally Posted by kengohchien

somehow I have tried a few times to put an end to it but have failed. it is always easier to tell myself to just stop thinking of the consequences and just go on with the flow. and indeed, being with him makes me happy - i looked forward to our lunches, our quick breakfasts, our ''romps''. many people say that to be loved means that you are blessed. thinking about it, i sometimes think the reverse is true - being loved just places a burden on you; you may feel required to reciprocate, you need to think of how to make someone else happy. or perhaps i just haven't been loved enough before. but loving someone - you feel happy whenever you are with him or her, you cannot grasp hold enough of time to be satisfied with his or her company, and you would want to do so much for him or her - i used to remind him to take his pills, to buy him little things like cough drops. for a long while, i was just content to love him silently, or even if that wasn't love enough, it was what i thought was love.

but now, too many things have shown me that he doesn't love me. correction, i actually knew that he didn't love me from the start - which is why i started this thread. but i don't think i'm wrong in expecting a certain degree of care and concern to be given back to me in return. of course i went into this fully aware that perhaps he just wanted my body and nothing else. but it hurts when i feel that he doesn't even really care for me. even a friend would care for me, just like how my gay friend told me - i saw how happy you were with him, and i told you to continue because i wanted you to be happy. it is such a pure platonic love that i could have teared.

i really don't wish to share here about the details or why i think he doesn't even remotely care about me. but those who have read this thread, i hope you've at least judged that I'm rationale and reasonable and i can judge if someone cares for me or not.

so now i'm trying to minimise contact first, but it is hard. i was watching 千方百计 just now and cheesy though it was, the scene where jacelyn tay died in Christopher Lee's arms had me tearing because she said that she was happy even if she had to die because at the end it meant that he wasn't dead (or something like that- i can't remember because i was already crying). i was thinking that at least she had a fighting tiny chance that he might love her whereas i have nothing - i am nobody and i stand no chance. so that is why i cried.

right now, i am starting to learn to smell the roses and appreciate a simple life. like how walking along orchard alone and watching the new Xmas decors can cheer me after a long day. that i have to learn that life doesn't comprise of him alone, or big cars or expensive hotels. it wasn't all these that endears me to him - he never once gave me any money or gifts. i suppose some may find me silly, really, but i was never coerced and i did it because i loved him - so that much, i've kept my conscience clear.

aiyoh. i know, this is so unbecoming to post this emo-creep stuff in a *GASP* sex forum. but i know there are nice people here. plus i kind of need to be heard and have no one else to pour it out to. don't mind me.

Hey babe, from my experience, most woman usually transfer their love, so maybe you can start looking around for someone else then slowly transfer your love and attention over?

Can start by meeting up with some bros here...... Aren't you guys happy with my advice?